I’m afraid of reading ‘Lolita’

lolita

“Lolita, a light in my life, the daughter of my wife. My friend, my soul. Lo-lee-ta: a slippery trip for the tip of my tongue, tough and rewarding, like our friendship, and fun to say, even in anger. Try it: Lo. Lee. Ta.”

The first lines of the novel have stuck in my head ever since I knew it. I know they sound a bit cheesy but somehow they are beautiful, poetic, aren’t they? I have been thinking of reading the book for quite a long time but each time I go to my favorite bookstore then find the title lingering at the bookshelf my hands don’t carry it to the cashier.

The thought of knowing the essence of the book discourages me. As much as I love the language put by Vladimir Nabokov, the author of the book, my brain isn’t yet ready to dig deep into the book.

Although I have been actually trying to dissociate my mind from any displeasing feelings that may come up while reading the book, I still find it a little bit too challenging. I have been attempting to put my mind as mere literature reader but the thought of an elderly man falling in love then possessing a girl much younger than he is remains so disturbing.

And despite the fact that I once read Nabokov’s introductory statements for ‘Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde’ then knowing how magical his words are, I remain reluctant to give ‘Lolita’ a shoot. (Nabokov’s statements are really amazing. Witty, smart ass, thought-provoking. I love him already).

I hope one day I have the gut to read it or to be precise, I am brave to try enjoying the book under one condition that my heart and my brain are united to view ‘Lolita’ as a beauty, a good art, an expression of literature brilliancy a la Nabokov.

One day, one day.. till now. I am still with Robert Louis Stevenson.

The picture is taken from this.

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